I'm living the high life. And I will try to paint a picture for you as to why I'm saying this. I'm writing from my hammock. And as is that's not enough, I'm on top of a sand dune in between two palm trees, right in front of waves crashing on a Carolina shore. For the past week I have been living in a house with 6 beautiful and wonderful women (normally I would feel weird calling my best friends women, but after last thursday when we graduated it seems a little more normal.)
The reason I am rubbing in the wonderfulness (is that a word?) of my situation is to say that I couldn't have planned this better. I look back on everything that I have experienced in high school and I couldn't feel more blessed. It's a crazy feeling, I can never find words to describe the greatness of God's presence in situations and God's presence in the past four years of my life is inevitable.
The funny thing about all this is a lot of things in high school didn't go my way. I've dealt with a broken heart, broken family, broken friendships, and broken situations, the list could go on.
Last night one of my best friends passed out. That sounds really bad since we're on senior week, which is already negatively connotated . But I assure you low blood pressure, nothing alcoholic, caused this. When this happened,seeing that none of us are doctors, the only thing we knew to do was take her to the ER. And when she came out some one asked her what the doctor said was wrong. She jokingly said "they told me I'm broken." It struck me how true this was.
It's almost humbling when we realize how broken we all are. When we become aware of the pieces we are in or of the shattered state of our heart. But His word says
The reason I am rubbing in the wonderfulness (is that a word?) of my situation is to say that I couldn't have planned this better. I look back on everything that I have experienced in high school and I couldn't feel more blessed. It's a crazy feeling, I can never find words to describe the greatness of God's presence in situations and God's presence in the past four years of my life is inevitable.
The funny thing about all this is a lot of things in high school didn't go my way. I've dealt with a broken heart, broken family, broken friendships, and broken situations, the list could go on.
Last night one of my best friends passed out. That sounds really bad since we're on senior week, which is already negatively connotated . But I assure you low blood pressure, nothing alcoholic, caused this. When this happened,seeing that none of us are doctors, the only thing we knew to do was take her to the ER. And when she came out some one asked her what the doctor said was wrong. She jokingly said "they told me I'm broken." It struck me how true this was.
It's almost humbling when we realize how broken we all are. When we become aware of the pieces we are in or of the shattered state of our heart. But His word says
"Gather the pieces, let nothing be wasted" John 6:12
He wants to pick up all the crumbs, pieces, tears, and breaks and mold them back together into a beautiful creation that he intended us to be. Being held together by the gentleness of his mercy and the strength of his love.
As comforting as that is, its the last part that is thrilling to me. "let nothing be wasted." We so often hope for God's will but when something doesn't go out way we get tripped out. It throws us for a loop when we realize our will might not be the same as God's will.
My will was not fulfilled for a good portion of my last four years. (Praise God!) But His was, and though the shattered pieces, he has picked them up and let nothing go to waste. He has blessed me unconditionally.
...a side note, this in it self is a lesson for me. He loves UNconditionally. How often do we love on condition? We love because someone loves us, or either we don't love because someone has hurt us. Praise God, our Redeemer doesn't love us any less for all the times we hurt him.
Back to the point...I have discovered hope is not something we can imagine. Max Lucado says "hope is not a wish granted" and he's right. Hope is unexpected. Hope is God surprising us out of out socks. We cannot wish for it because we can't imagine it. Hope is what God has done in situations, friendships and relationships that have done everything from hurt me, helped me, broken me, and healed me. But most importantly molded me into what I am now.
While I believe we grow numb to hurt and brokenness, I also believe we grow numb to beauty and amazement. However through the rush and business or graduation, graduation parties, senior beach trip, and a million and one thank you notes, God has slowed me down and opened my eyes to this. Opened my eyes to the beauty in a group of seven girls who have spent all the tears and laughs of high school together, the beauty in the hesitation of leaving behind on of my best friends a year younger than me when I go to college but excitement of watching her grow her senior year, beauty in the giddiness of getting to know someone new and not knowing where in the world God will take the relationship, beauty in wisdom and advice of friends that have just finished their freshman year of college, beauty in the community of the people I'm about to go to puerto Rico with and the excitement we have to serve as one body.
I could go on forever. Point is, God has a way of slapping us in the face and surprising us out of our socks, a way of sweetly breaking us only to repair us into a creation far better than we could ever imagine. Our sight so often though becomes so blurry and tear-filled we can't see that he's working right in front of us. We cant see bitter glances of a lost friends will turn into loving and open arms of new friends. We can't see then unconfident broken heart will find a new confidence in the Lord. We hear "God works for the good of those who love him," it's such simple concept but we doubt it so much. But realizing this is key, reAlizing He is, He has, and He WILL continue to work for our good. This is thrilling, not quite scary, and more than mere excitement. Thrill.
Ironically enough I'm writing in a journal that I've written in from the first day of my senior year and I just so happen to be on the last page. I realize that when I started I never could have guessed the words, thoughts, and stories that would fill up these pages, the curve balls God has thrown me, the slaps in the face He's given me, or the surprise parties He has thrown me. Now that I can see that, I can only hope that my next journal will be filled with just as many stories of God picking up my pieces and molding them back with His beauty and love.
He wants to pick up all the crumbs, pieces, tears, and breaks and mold them back together into a beautiful creation that he intended us to be. Being held together by the gentleness of his mercy and the strength of his love.
As comforting as that is, its the last part that is thrilling to me. "let nothing be wasted." We so often hope for God's will but when something doesn't go out way we get tripped out. It throws us for a loop when we realize our will might not be the same as God's will.
My will was not fulfilled for a good portion of my last four years. (Praise God!) But His was, and though the shattered pieces, he has picked them up and let nothing go to waste. He has blessed me unconditionally.
...a side note, this in it self is a lesson for me. He loves UNconditionally. How often do we love on condition? We love because someone loves us, or either we don't love because someone has hurt us. Praise God, our Redeemer doesn't love us any less for all the times we hurt him.
Back to the point...I have discovered hope is not something we can imagine. Max Lucado says "hope is not a wish granted" and he's right. Hope is unexpected. Hope is God surprising us out of out socks. We cannot wish for it because we can't imagine it. Hope is what God has done in situations, friendships and relationships that have done everything from hurt me, helped me, broken me, and healed me. But most importantly molded me into what I am now.
While I believe we grow numb to hurt and brokenness, I also believe we grow numb to beauty and amazement. However through the rush and business or graduation, graduation parties, senior beach trip, and a million and one thank you notes, God has slowed me down and opened my eyes to this. Opened my eyes to the beauty in a group of seven girls who have spent all the tears and laughs of high school together, the beauty in the hesitation of leaving behind on of my best friends a year younger than me when I go to college but excitement of watching her grow her senior year, beauty in the giddiness of getting to know someone new and not knowing where in the world God will take the relationship, beauty in wisdom and advice of friends that have just finished their freshman year of college, beauty in the community of the people I'm about to go to puerto Rico with and the excitement we have to serve as one body.
I could go on forever. Point is, God has a way of slapping us in the face and surprising us out of our socks, a way of sweetly breaking us only to repair us into a creation far better than we could ever imagine. Our sight so often though becomes so blurry and tear-filled we can't see that he's working right in front of us. We cant see bitter glances of a lost friends will turn into loving and open arms of new friends. We can't see then unconfident broken heart will find a new confidence in the Lord. We hear "God works for the good of those who love him," it's such simple concept but we doubt it so much. But realizing this is key, reAlizing He is, He has, and He WILL continue to work for our good. This is thrilling, not quite scary, and more than mere excitement. Thrill.
Ironically enough I'm writing in a journal that I've written in from the first day of my senior year and I just so happen to be on the last page. I realize that when I started I never could have guessed the words, thoughts, and stories that would fill up these pages, the curve balls God has thrown me, the slaps in the face He's given me, or the surprise parties He has thrown me. Now that I can see that, I can only hope that my next journal will be filled with just as many stories of God picking up my pieces and molding them back with His beauty and love.
